Your Values are Showing! (TAW035)

Episode 035 – Your Values are Showing!

Pain is a terrible thing to waste. At least, that’s what my Trauma Therapist friend says. So, how are we using the pain of this difficult time of pandemic and protests so that we can be better people?

This is part 3 of my 3 part conversation with Byron Kehler, a trauma therapist with nearly 40 years of experience. In this last conversation we’ll talk about who the pandemic is revealing us to be, and how we can come out the other side better people.

Show Notes

  • Byron Kehler is a trauma therapist with nearly 40 years of professional experience. Learn more about him at
  • Production Note: My apologies for the less than ideal audio and a bit of video lag. I’m learning the ropes with remote interviews, and this one didn’t turn out as well as I would like. It’s been edited so that it is as enjoyable as possible.
  • We are experiencing a Real-time Values Clarification Exercise:
    • Therapists and psychologists often use hypothetical situations to help people think through their priorities and values. What we are experiencing right now with the pandemic, protests, and political division is working this same way.
    • “The way we are reacting right now to the circumstances we find ourselves in is revealing our true values.” – Byron Kehler.
  • Values are our priorities and deeply held beliefs including our internal motivations. They serve as a compass for our actions and reactions and often go unevaluated.
  • Aspirational Values are values that we wish we held or even that we say we hold, but that our behavior doesn’t align with.
  • A question we must consider: what does it mean to “love our neighbor as ourselves” in the midst of a pandemic?
  • Here’s a great summary article to Lawrence Kolberg’s Stages of Moral Development that Byron referred to.

If you prefer, watch and share the video version on Youtube.

Resources Mentioned

  • The Untangle Workbook – Sort out your complicated feelings with this guided journal. The first 30 pages teach you the basics of what emotions are, what is happening in your body and brain when you feel them, and what they mean. The rest of the workbook is a template you can use to walk through an emotional experience so that you can understand it and respond with wisdom. Learn more at the link above.
  • The Untangled Heart Workshop Online – Learn what’s happening in your body and brain when you feel those big emotions, how they are connected to your story, and how to navigate them with wisdom. This is the online version of the live workshop. 5 hours of video teaching, guided journaling exercises, 23-page downloadable notes packet and more. Learn more at the link above.

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